Name that tube

I wrote about Ollie's flat front tire on Wednesday (cause unknown). Then she had another flat on Thursday that was perhaps the worst yet (I pulled a hunk of glass out of her rear tire). I was so wound up by the time I got into work that I ranted about that one on the CHB blog. It made me feel slightly better, but I was still in a bit of a funk for the rest of the day. I mean, come ON.

Well, yesterday I rode my bike all over town with no problems, running errands, cruising around downtown for a spell to enjoy the gorgeous afternoon, and eventually ending up at the shop -- I had gone in to work for a few hours to run through some things with Denise. I wrapped up the work I was doing, called my pal Heather to let her know I was heading over for dinner, and walked out back to pull Ollie off the rack. I really thought the guys were playing a prank on me at the shop yesterday. Another flat. Front tire. Twisted shard of metal this time (I had to pry it out with pliers). But no, it was not a prank. God hates me. Or maybe my dad has set up some kind of arrangement with the Big Guy to keep me from leaving on my trip at the end of the month. Hmmm....

This makes seven flats between the two bikes in less than a month. SEVEN. To the credit of my friends and colleagues at the shop, they insisted that I get tougher tires. Can I just get tires made of kevlar? Or convert my tires to those metal rolling things that tanks use to get around? (Sure, maybe the added weight would be a bit excessive, but I was a little exasperated.) Ben and Chris talked me through a few options and I walked out with a new front tire (and I'll be ordering a new set next week).

My advice to you, dear readers, is this: buy stock in tire tubes. Now. Specifically, 26 x 1.50 presta valve tubes. (I think I may be able to single-handedly reverse our country's recent economic downturn. Or, rather, Ollie will.)

My friend Rudy suggested that I stop writing about each flat tire and simply post a picture of each one. For my part, I'm thinking of maybe naming each flat. You know, like they name hurricanes and tropical storms on the news. So far we've had: Aloisius, Beelzebub, Charlemagne, Dorian, Eloise, Frankenstein, and Gertrude. I wonder if I can get disaster relief funding from the federal government to cover the cost of all of the tubes I've been burning through. Hey, want a flat tire named after you? All the cool kids are doing it. Send in $10: it's yours.